Hijacked

By Faith Chatham - excerpt from SACRED SPACES - copyright 2009

The Bishop
and most of the convention delegates
voted
to leave the church;

In leaving,
they decided to take the diocese
with them.

My parish left
with the Bishop,
though it still stands down the block
near home,
it’s became part
of the Southern Cone.

Most of us
were Christened as babies,
then decided to be Confirmed
when we grew older.
We decided
to become Episcopalian.

When the Bishop
and the parish left
taking us with them,
we didn’t have a say.

To remain Episcopalian
we had “to transfer back-in”
or we couldn’t stay!

I’ve never been south of Honduras,
yet they took “my spiritual allegiance”,
legally shifting it
far beyond
where I’d explored
and chose
for it to be!

I’m more comfortable
with the Theology
of the Bishop and most of those
who left than with some “who stayed.”

Most of those I hold most dear
have gone south.

Joining a church,
uniting with a denomination,
changing your “letter”
is very personal.

No one,
not an elected delegate
or my beloved Bishop
should be allowed
to make
that personal
of a decision
for me.

It’s between me and God.
Not even
the broken Theology
or politics of the church
justifies
such intrusion.

I transferred back
“into”
the Episcopal Church.
I may not stay,
but if I do,
or if I leave,
it won’t be by “majority vote”
or decree
of a church convention.

It will be about
how I’m fed,
what I feel,
how I serve,
Who I hear,
what I see,
Whose I am.
It will be a decision between God and me.
-- by Faith Chatham
copyright 2009

I Used to Listen Better in the Church

By Faith Chatham - excerpt from SACRED SPACES - copyright 2009

God, I’m not comfortable with your church.
I feel closer to you when I’m here at home,
or in the yard with the air caressing my cheek,
or watching the bird perched on the patio fence.

Though I love the liturgy
and am fed by your word,
in congregations of people
I feel the distortion;
Distracted by others’ imperfections
I fail to recognize my own.

I used to hear you better when in church,
though I always seemed to hear you best
in church alone!

There is no sweeter chorus
than those I hear
when “no one’s there”.

When kneeling at the chancel rail,
when no mortal footsteps are near,
I feel the breath of Saints and Mary’s presence
and hear you speaking, Jesus.

I’m never closer to you Lord,
than at the communion rail.
Then I close out the world
and taste your Grace.

Though Church is social
and partly intellectual,
I find mortal chatter distracts me
from your face.
Frequently, it’s an arrow
directing me to prayer.

Sometimes,
someone says a phrase
which draws me closer to you.
Yet, usually,
I get distracted
or distract others.

Frequently,
I find it sweeter to sit
and listen
for you Lord, when alone.

In solitude
I hear
the heavenly host,
let you
test the spirits,
and fill me
with your peace.

I don’t fit in
with any of them,
yet they are my brothers and sisters.

Of all times
to be a “high church
Episcopalian!”
I have no peace
about either staying
or going.
I certainly have no allegiance
to the diocese of the Southern Cone,
yet recognize the violence
which propelled
those I love from the fold.

Instead of “evangelism” or “spiritual formation”,
energy and resources are enmeshed
in litigation.

Some mutter
about “them
hijacking a diocese.”

I mutter
about “them
hijacking Advent and Christmas!”

Instead of penance
and Holy Expectation,
communicants
of “both camps”
were thrust into incessant meetings
of reorganization!

I shook my head in dismay,
bewildered,
thinking what a sad way
to welcome the Messiah!

I see the flaws
in all of us;
am repelled
by “self-righteousness”
as each attempts
to “reflect God
as we understand Him”.

Some stand on canon and scripture,
caught in the web
of judging.

Others interpret it
as they see it,
feeling righteous
in “being broadminded”
and “more generous”.

It seems we’re all caught
in the web
of our own thoughts.

Come, Lord Jesus.
Deliver us from ourselves.

May we be protected
from the state
of “us and them.”

There is nothing righteous
in either camp,
yet in You,
everything is Sacred
in both.

-- by Faith Chatham
copyright 2009